A Letter To Myself 4 Weeks From Now
Well, right now we are 7 days into social distancing and we’re all finding it hard, both sad and a little bit scary at the same time. For me it’s mostly sadness, I’m missing our freedom, missing our friends. I hate having to tell the kids that everything they love to do is cancelled, everyone they love to see can’t be seen. I hate being kept in one place, I just want to explore and travel as normal. But right now that’s not possible, not if we want to stop the spread of Covid-19. My only company is my little family, just my husband and 2 kids and as much as I love them, it is so incredibly hard. The not knowing when you can have your neighbour around for a coffee and playdate again, not knowing when the kids can roughplay with their best friends, racing around the woods together again. Not being able to go to the sea, I love the sea, it’s my happy place. Not seeing your parents for who knows how long. It’s all so incredibly hard, especially when you aren’t a home person like me. I know plenty of others have it much harder, those awesome people in the NHS on the frontline and single parents who have nobody but the kids to talk to, hats off to you all and the amazing jobs you are doing. But I still can’t get rid of the sadness and still find myself struggling too.
We may well home educate our kids, but right now this isn’t home education, not the kind we know, this isolation from the majority of the world is not normal. The museums, castles, parks and woodlands that have been our playgrounds and education are now closed and off limits. We can’t go to our usual groups and clubs, it’s all out of bounds, so this is a huge change for us too, even though our kids have never been to school. I can’t even let them play out down the street as we normally would.
I can’t imagine how you are feeling 4 weeks in the future. Right now I can’t see an end in sight and that’s part of the problem. I hope in 4 weeks there’s more information and you have an idea of where we are heading and for how much longer it will be. I hope that you have kept busy (you have plenty of walls to paint!) and managed to keep the kids happy and find ways to see their friends via video calls and playdates. Shouting across the street to their friends that they can no longer visit. Maybe you have had time to tidy up the garden and finish those craft projects.
Really I hope that watching the world coping with this through the screen of your laptop and phone is enough. Because right now I’m struggling and I don’t know how to keep going for the months that are predicted. Have a cry, sometimes it’s good to get it out, then put on a brave face and keep smiling. The kids need to see that, they need to see that you are confident and able to find happiness in the small things in life. You are their rock and need to help them get through this too. If it’s feeling a bit much don’t be afraid to put the TV on for them or let the do Cosmic Kids Yoga for a bit whilst you gather yourself together again. You can get through this.
If you are still finding it hard, please put on the music, dance with the kids, read joke books together and make up silly stories about crazy monsters. It’s been a hard 4 weeks and I know you just want to break all the rules. But it’s important to maintain social distancing and isolation where necessary, otherwise everything our wonderful NHS is doing will all be in vain. The virus will spread too quickly and not everyone can be saved, there are only so many beds and ventilators. Keep doing your part, no matter how difficult it seems, at least you are lucky that you can still hug your little ones close and wave at grandparents over Facetime. That’s much better than knowing you could have killed someone by going to the play park or travelling to a busy seaside. You can do this, just take it one day at the time, this is a new (temporary) normal. Life and freedom will resume again, just be patient and hug the kids close.
Love Jenny xx